Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Just some funny headlines to brighten your day

And who says that newsprint is going out of style? Take a few minutes and check out these headlines and other bits from newspaper around the world. You'd figure editors would actually read the headlines.

Federal Agents Raid Gun Shop, Find Weapons
County to pay $250,000 to advertise lack of funds
DOE to do NEPA's EIS on BNFL's AMWTP at INEEL after SRA protest
Utah Poison Control Center reminds everyone not to take poison
Statistics show that teen pregnancy drops off significantly after age 25
Include your Children when Baking Cookies
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted
Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case
Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents
Farmer Bill Dies in House
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
Stud Tires Out
Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again
British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms
Eye Drops off Shelf
Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim
Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax
Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies
Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years
War Dims Hope for Peace
If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge
Deer Kill 17,000
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy
Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire
British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply
Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
New Vaccine May Contain Rabies
Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing
Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing
Air Head Fired
Steals Clock, Faces Time
Prosecutor Releases Probe into Undersheriff
Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni
Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

And Classified Ads and articles:
WAITRESS NEEDED. Must be 18 years old with 20 years experience. Apply in Person Carnation Restaurant.
Tips to avoid alligator attacks. Don't swim in waters inhabited by large alligators.
Army vehicle disappears. Australian Army vehicle gone missing after being painted with camouflage.

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